Monday 8 July 2013

Trimming my famous bush and sticking with the non diet.

So it's day 2 of the official heatwave today and I decided to do a bit of weeding and chopping and trimming of the front garden outside  my house. My horticultural guru Leanne is in France at the moment probably eating baguettes and drinking cheap wine and shrugging a lot so I just dived in and went for it. I was brutal and reckless.
 H helped me. When I say 'helped' she sat outside for 45 seconds and then a seagull shat in her breakfast cereal. I don't think the local gulls like us very much. She then held the rubbish sack open for me to throw the weeds  and the bits that I trimmed ( it was more of a hack to be honest ) into.
 
My famous bush has been butchered. It's a lily bush and I would like to credit myself for the abundance of perfectly formed flowers that adorn it every year but I can't. It was here when I moved in and all I do every summer is give it a good old trim and hey presto it's all good until the following year. Due to the size of it and the fact you can't miss it when going up or down my street a lot of people take photos of it but a lot of people also use it to hide unwanted items.
 
Lots of cigarette butts
 
Burger and chip plastic cartons
 
An ice cream
 
The odd shoe
 
A pair of knickers
 
A half full ( notice my optimism ) bottle of vodka.
 
These are all things that I have found in my bush. With regard to the bottle of vodka..............someone once asked me if I had drunk the remains??? I may have my moments, but even I have standards!
 
And now my front garden is neat and lovely and I have thought long and hard and I won't be returning to fat club tomorrow. I bit the bullet and jumped gingerly onto the scales this morning and the damage done by lots of naughty food and too many magners over the weekend???
 
THREE POUNDS!
 
I can handle this - I was brave and took it on the chins. I am resuming my non diet. I will resist bread and limit my tatties and say like the kids from Grange Hill sang in the mid to late eighties- if faced with a lovely fat crispy chip? I think it's best if I too-
 
JUST SAY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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